Ya Gotta Love F.O.O.D.

We now take a break from our regularly scheduled programming to bring you this special announcement.

Take a moment to answer a few brief questions: 

• When dining out, do you have a tendency to stare at food on the tables of other diners?
• Does the mere sight of food make you giddy?
• Does all conversation for you cease the moment you eyeball a plate of food?
• Does the world as you know it come to a screeching halt when a waiter waltzes in your line of vision with a plate of food, causing you to stare uncontrollably until the food is out of sight?

If you’ve answered “YES” to any of these questions, then you my friend likely suffer the near-debilitating effects of F.O.O.D.™.

What is  F.O.O.D.™, you ask?

F.O.O.D.™ is Food Ocular Obsessive Disorder, and it is characterized by the uncontrollable, sometimes subconscious act of staring at, dare I say ogling, food, particularly in public places. F.O.O.D.™ can strike anyone at any time, regardless of race, color, creed, nationality, religion, age or sexual preference.

My name is Valerie and I am a longtime sufferer of F.O.O.D.™.  For years I was blissfully unaware that I was afflicted with the condition, let alone ever having any knowledge that it was something that even existed until my husband made an astute observation one day. “Why the hell do you keep staring at everybody’s food? You're scaring the children!”

It was then that I knew. I had a problem.

Night after night, hunched over my computer I conducted exhaustive research on the affliction but quickly discovered that it wasn't in any medical books and it didn’t even have a name. In 2011, I endeavored to label this condition and F.O.O.D.™ was born.

Now, I’m on a mission to find others out there who, like me, aren’t ashamed to say to the world, “Hi. My name is [  fill in the blank  ] and I suffer from F.O.O.D.”

Say it with me now...

Won’t you join me on my quest to bring this malady to the open? Show your support by purchasing your very own F.O.O.D.™ t-shirt and let the world know that you too have wandering eyeballs. (Shirts available in S, M, L and XL, and can be purchased HERE. "Like" the Bon Vivant Facebook page and receive a 15% discount).

This has been a non-celebrity endorsement for F.O.O.D.™. No animals were harmed in the making of this endorsement. Batteries not included. Order in the next 10 minutes and receive the satisfaction of knowing you ordered quickly. Objects in mirror are closer than they appear.